Military Monday: Posting Phase Seven

The HHT

Last week my husband and I flew across the country (without kids) to search for our new home. 

Anyone who has ever had to find a new home in five days knows how stressful a House Hunting Trip (HHT) can be. It's not just about finding a house. It's about finding a home. A place where your kids will be happy and the schools will be good schools and there will be friends nearby and grocery stores and extracurricular activities and maybe even a decent place to lay your head. It's about taking the dollars you have available and maximizing their effect. And not only do you have to find this wondrous place, you have to buy it (or rent it), fill out reams of paperwork, set up postal services and register your kids (if you have any) for schools while suffering from mild jet-lag and hearing that clock tick off your limited time. 

What's not to love about a place like this?
Vancouver Island

It's a very delicate balance. And usually it's a very, very stressful five days. 

Only this time...it wasn't.

Oh my goodness I'm in love with our new place! Seriously. And it's not about the house we decided

on (although it was a nice one). It's about the community and the setting. The people were friendly, the scenery was GORGEOUS and it just completely blew my mind that in a few short weeks we will be living there.

That, plus I got to spend a week together with my handsome husband in this little slice of paradise. When does that ever happen? No kids, nice restaurants and views to die for. Yes there were a few stressful moments. Yes we looked at 18 houses in two days, and toured three schools, and by the end my eyes were starting to cross. But the overall effect was more of a house hunting adventure. 

The view from our hotel room.
So lovely...

There are lots of HHT horror stories out there. If you've ever done this, I bet you've got a few nice ones to tell (feel free to share in the comments below) I've had a few doozies of my own. But a beautiful place and a positive outlook can make the world of difference.

Brenda

More Posting phases here: One, Two, Three, Four, Five, Six.

Military Monday: Posting Phase Five

PHASE FIVE: THE LONG WAIT

Everything is ready. The house is clean. The plans are made. The signs are up and our stash and dash is perfected.

But the phone doesn't ring.

The housing market slumps.

And that highly anticipated rapid and insane house sale doesn't happen.

Still waiting...

Sadly, not every house sale goes as planned. No matter how much time you spend thinking about your listing price, no matter how magazine-perfect your rooms are, no matter how many bells and whistles your feature sheet cites, sometimes the right buyer just doesn't materialize. We've been on both ends of the spectrum. We've had a week-long insane buyer's bonanza and we've had the six-month long haul--complete with hubby moving on ahead of us while I try to keep my brain from exploding in a spotless house with three kids and two pets.

Sometimes there's no magic to it. You list aggressively, you clean like Cinderella, and you wait. You lower your price, offer incentives...and you wait.

Patience is a virtue I lack.

There are lots of tips out there for ensuring a quick house sale (like this one from HGTV). But once you've exhausted yourself cleaning out closets and mopping floors and folding your bathroom towels just so, all there is left to do is hang in there and hope and pray for the best. You still have to live in your house.

Unfortunately so does the rest of your family.

Ah, the joys of military posting-hood.


Brenda

Want to read more Posting Phases?  Check them out!

Posting Phase Four: The Stash and Dash

Posting Phase Three: Orders!

Posting Phase Two: Closet Clean-out

Posting Phase One: Real Estate Research

Posting Phase Four: The Stash and Dash

The sign is up on the lawn. You've cleaned and buffed and polished sorted and tidied and fooled yourself into believing the house is ready for showings. But you still live in your house. Your kids still make messes. You still have to shower in your bathroom. Your pets still track in mud and bits of grass. And that coffee is still an essential start to your day.

Then the phone call you've been anticipating (and dreading) comes. A showing! And can these lovely potential home-buyers come in TWENTY-FIVE MINUTES?

Gaaaaaaah! NOOOOOOOOOOO!


Thus begins the phase known as STASH AND DASH. You run around madly with a vacuum in one hand, a damp cloth in the other and dusting rags attached to your feet... while canned cinnamon buns cook at warp speed in the oven. Dirty socks get stashed in closets, pj's under pillows, toothbrushes jammed in drawers, today's breakfast dishes unceremoniously dumped in dishwashers(on top of clean dishes, of course). Items of all shapes and sizes get stuffed in your pockets--coins, pet-hair, hay, toy cars, loose threads, buttons, tissues, dryer sheets, paperclips, pens, pencils...the list goes on and on. Time accelerates until there's nothing to do but give up, hope for the best, and (pets and toddlers in tow) jump into the car and leave.

Inevitably, this is also the time when said pet decides to vomit on your just cleaned carpet. Or your toddler dumps her entire lego collection on the floor. Or a glass drops on the floor, shattering and spewing shards in forty directions, while also denting your not-so-pristene hardwood. Or your basement floods, a flock of geese flies by and spatters your house with ick, the cat runs off with a carpet-thread pulling behind her, the cupboard door falls off of it's hinges or the toilet clogs.

And in the military? This is usually when your husband/spouse takes off for a four month course in the Caribbean, and you are doing it all by yourself while he drinks rum from a coconut in a tiki bar on the beach.

I remember one house showing where the home-buyers showed up half an hour early, and my then eighteen-month-old exploded with the stinkiest poop on the planet just as I noticed them walking in our back yard. Yeah. The aftereffects were smelled for weeks afterwords. Needless to say, our house didn't sell that day.

It's a crazy time, selling a house. You'd think after eight moves I'd have perfected the art of the stash and dash, but every house is different. It's certainly never dull!

I'm sure you have a great house-selling story... ever have someone come into your house unannounced? Have a household disaster the day before a second shown? What's your worst (or best) stash and dash? tell us about it below!

~Brenda

Check out my other Posting Phase Blogs!

Posting Phase One: Real Estate Research

Posting Phase Two: The Closet Clean-Out

Posting Phase Three: Orders!

Posting Phase Three: Orders!

Maybe we could just move here? The Dunnes at
the Universal Studios.

As usually happens, my hubby received his posting orders at the moment he least expected... while standing in line at the Duelling Dragons ride at Universal Studios, Orlando! Ah, the age of modern technology has changed the process quite a lot in our 25+ years associated with the military. Nothing like a buzzing Blackberry as you are staring down uncertain death by Harry Potter Dragon-coaster, to let you know your life is--quite literally--about to turn upside down and topsy turvy.

So...joking aside, we are extremely excited to be moving across the continent this year to beautiful Comox, British Columbia! (Or at least I've heard it's beautiful. The closest I've been is Victoria, about 3 hours south.) For my American friends, Comox is north of Seattle. This is an amazing posting for my hubby, and we're all looking forward to spending time with tall trees, big mountains and ocean beaches. Also looking forward to meeting new friends and reconnecting with old ones on the west coast. The last time I lived out west was for basic training in Chilliwack, BC...25 years ago!

What the posting message really means to us (when Dragon rides and vacation trips are over and reality starts to sink in) is that now we can finally DO SOMETHING about our move. Real estate agents have been called on both sides of the country, appointments have been booked and the ball is rolling toward a summer move. Posting Phase Four and all the others will be coming up soon and it's nice to be moving forward instead of flying circles in a holding pattern. Now if we can just sell our house, I can actually look at the real estate sites with a purpose!

Speaking of which... Must. Go. Clean.

Any one else out there received a posting message? Where are you off too this summer?

Brenda

Military Monday: Posting Phase Two

Phase Two: Closet Clean-out

Orders Received yet?  No.

Estimated TTD: Narrowing it down, but no orders, no point.

Our junk is alive. 

There's no other possible explanation. It has to be alive, because how else could it multiply at such an alarming rate? We recycle, we give clothes away, we only replace things when necessary, we take things OUT of the house by the trailer load. So how is it that EVERY SINGLE CLOSET in this house is FULL of crap? 

I just don't get it. It must be reproducing.

Even though we don't have a message, we are pretty sure one is coming. After all, we've been in this house three years. So I, being a planner to the nth degree, have begun the process. 

THE PRE-LISTING CLEAN-OUT.

God help me. Having sold a gazillion houses in the past, I know that the minute we call a real-estate agent, they will be out here. Wanting forms filled out. Wanting measurements taken and...

Wanting magazine-perfect pictures.

Ugh. 

So that means everything needs to be ready before we even call them. Closets need to be cleaned out. Let me tell you. A teen's closet is a scary place. You won't find Narnia in that baby. There's dead things in there. Skeletons and cobwebs and mould. Science projects gone rogue. There's a reason kids don't like to sleep with their closet doors open, and I am about to go into battle with the things that go bump in the night.

The last time I cleaned out closets I barely escaped with my life.

It's an emotional, frustrating, hypertensive time, because I get to find out just how many items of 'clean' clothing got tossed into a back corner. How many treasured items got thrown underneath mounds of forgotten toys. How many half-eaten food items somehow found their way into neatly folded sweaters. And how that 'I NEED TO HAVE IT!' item has spent the past three years still in it's sealed box.

I have to take it one closet at a time, with lots of chocolate and wine.

And so, because today is my day off, I've got my haz-mat suit on, my bleach in hand, and I'm ready.

If you don't hear from me in two days, send help.

Brenda.

Military Monday: Posting Phase One

Phase One: Real Estate Research

Orders received yet: No.

Estimated TTD (time 'til departure): Unknown. Maybe six months?

Confession time.

I am addicted to real estate websites. Maybe not as bad as I'm addicted to Sherlock but--it's bad. 

I have an app, and I'm not afraid to use it. 

It starts innocently enough...sometimes just days after moving into our current house. Checking to make sure the price we paid for our brand-spanking new bungalow/two-story/high-ranch/colonial/salt-box is reasonable. Usually brought on by a For Sale sign in our neighbourhood. Oh look! That house is for sale! Wonder what it's worth? Why don't I just check? Oh! Look how they decorated that room! I like that kitchen...! 

Innocent mind candy, something to fill a spare moment. Checking on my iPhone while waiting for a child after school, peeking in at lunch time to see what's new...that sort of thing.

But then hubs has a meeting with someone and a whisper comes home. Just a possibility--nothing definite. They need a (insert job here) in (insert base A here) or maybe (insert second possibility B here). In our world these whispers are just that--whispers. Gossip. Like little teases, thrown out to tweak your curiosity. 

Thus begins a manic website-checking phase. It only lasts a day or two, maybe a week. Checking neighbourhoods, ideal locations, proximity of schools, and most of all real estate-prices. This is, of course, accompanied by another, more serious evaluation of current home resale values, because we all know that what we sell determines what we can buy elsewhere. 

Things settle down. After all, it was just a rumour. No need to get too excited. 

I go back to the occasional check in, watching for For Sale signs and trying not to drive my husband crazy with the constant question... Any news?

And then another meeting happens. Or a phone call, or something that ratchets the possibility factor up from 50% to 98%. Suddently it's not Base A or Base B. It's only B. This is the conversation. The one that says 'There's always a chance you won't get posted to this base, but we've slotted you in.' 

Such sweet torture to the compulsive real-estate checker. 

Friends in the new area are called. Schools boundaries are researched, downloaded, printed out. Extra-curricular activities are mapped. And always the checking, checking, checking. Can we afford it? What if that one sells before we get our posting message?

Inevitably they do sell, and it's back to the websites. Look at that! A new house listed! Squirrel! 

And so begins the roller coaster known as Posting Season. Phase One of the Twelve Phases of Posting: Real Estate Research.The beginning of a loooooooooong journey of adventure and emotional upheaval. 

I've learned to love it. 

The thing is, I suspect I'm not alone in the military spouse world. Are you a Real Estate Researcher? Always on the look out for a new home? It's not that I don't love my current one. I do. I don't really want to move. I love our quiet home in the country...far enough away that we have no light pollution, yet close enough that I can work in the city. It's perfect. And would still be perfect if we were never posted again.

But I love to dream. I love the thrill of the search. 

Now...wasn't there a new home for sale on that street? 

I'm off to check...

Brenda

Note: I use this website for my addiction:  http://beta.realtor.ca/index.aspx?CultureId=1

What's your favourite?